Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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