So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
