She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
