YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize