That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
40s are totally the cure
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize