if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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