I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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