You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
