matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
