i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He? As in you personified your dick?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Couch. On fire.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
