i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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