my phone needs a breathalizer
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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