I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
