I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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