I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
My vagina just clenched in fear
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
