A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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