Me. At least after what I've been through.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
