is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
