His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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