Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Randomize
