When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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