How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
there's paper in my vomit.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
