Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
