Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Randomize