He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
