I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
