you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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