Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
