At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
