dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
