I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I look better un-naked...
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
