there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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