You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize