This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize