I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
