I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
