I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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