i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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