I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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