how can u be prego again
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
