We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
