My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
