It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
my liver is dry heaving
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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