I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize