Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
