My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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