Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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