why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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