you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
