Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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